Another midnight
Unwanted awakening
Dread for forthcoming
Unease grips tightly
Mind plays friendships dissolving
Both past and future
Written upon waking just after midnight, slightly disturbed.
I think I tasted it again today
That rare experience, precious
Honey from a hive
Communal joy
Connected on all edges of my honeycomb cell
Now I go out to replenish, alone again
Seeking more solitary nectar
How I hope to taste this honey again soon
🐝 🍯
My love grows in a mindfully cultivated garden
Raised to be shared with a small selection
As nutritious ingredients
For their wholesome efforts
…
Why do I write myself out of my own story
In my daily mind and in my work?
Things have changed
My melancholic trials
Are not quite as they were
They feel calmer somehow
Still reaching down, down, down
But closer to frozen
Closer to still
…
When I met you yesterday, T.
I sat with you for some time
Just listening
From the very beginning
You were precious
Eyes boring into mine
You were so animated, so excited
The more you talked
Realizing someone was listening
Really listening to you
…
From across borders
Distance irrelevant for
One forever tamed
I’m not much of a woman
Maybe I’m half of one
My body has the shape
We’ve largely agreed to call female
My chromosomes are oblique crosses
I’m seeing double
Am I missing half of my mind?
I play life defensively
Guarding what I must within reason
I take inside when I choose to
I bleed
But it feels like I missed something
When they were handing out
Club membership cards
Where’s the rest of me?
I check the F box on forms
With confidence
But at the same time
I feel like I’m sitting outside of it
Looking in
November 26, 2024
Written while riding a highway during a road trip.
Blink blink blink blink blink
Get out of the passing lane
You fucking knob-head
She sits at a huge dining table
That was crafted amateurly
But with great care, in rich mahogany
Low warm lighting surrounds her
Stars twinkle through the windows
Her arms across her chest, she holds herself
Staring at an item on the table
Pondering
She remembers that she hates the smell of metal…